an outsider?

herm...am pretty sad now...i was so excited that my dad came back from london after 5 month he was there...usually he would call me up and ask me to pick him up from the airport...but this time he didnt...i was devastated...he called me up yesterday before leaving i guess and said that he bought me the books that i asked for and that's all...

as time passes me and my dad are further and further away...it's not like the old times anymore...i feel like im an outsider...it all changed when my beloved mother past away...i've been feeling this for such a long time...but this time it's a sure thing...

this morning i expected a call from him...but he didn't call me at all...i waited till it was 9.am and gave him a call...he didn't seem happy to get a call from me...i asked him where was he and he said he was at my aunts place then i asked him when is he going back to his place and he said a bit later and that was it...then i just said ok i'll see ya later...am feeling the distance...

what can i do? right? i guess just be patient and be as happy as i can...things has changed so much...what am i to say? well i really hope that things would change coz am sick and tired of staying on my own...i need a family...i want to stay under one roof...but again i have to realise I'M AN OUTSIDER NOW!! what can i do? am on my own now...

well my dearest daddy i hope ur happy with the new family...and no matter what i love u so much...ur the most awesome dad a person can get...love you...mmuuahhkksss...